The Stairs Are my Enemy

By November 12, 2010Parenting, Safety

And Violet’s greatest love.

They called to her with their evil voice covered in candy sweetness and she crawled to them.  She looked to me for approval and I said NO.  Sweetie, those stairs could kill you.

Yes, every mother knows when this day comes it is the end of peace.  I am at war with my stairs.  Each day they pretend to be doing nothing when really I know they are plotting my daughter’s demise.

She did not listen to me.  Like I said, she is in love. Like each of my children, and probably yours, danger must be exciting.

Looks fun doesn’t it?  She has such pride in those sparkling eyes, like because she has reached the first step she can conquer them all.  I know the truth.  I tell her.  Violet honey, the stairs are evil.  They are dangerous.  Mommy knows.  It is not hard to fall down them.

For the first time in her little life – she completely ignores me.  Then again, this is one of the first direct orders I have had to give to my 9 month old.  Those fancy stairs are so enticing she moves ahead.

I have to pull the plug at this point because at stair two my little mommy brain freaked out.  I am not such a crazy blogger that I let her continue her attempted climb up into the arms of extreme danger.  Whoa there little baby.  Slow down.  The first floor works just fine for hanging out.

It is the first of many times she will ignore me and plunge into waters for her uncharted, but for me a known threat.

I won’t always be there to stop her.  I won’t always be there to catch her.

The stairs are just the first thing.  So simple.  So carpeted (after a near death fall with Miles).  So evil.

From this, my dear girl, I will protect you.  Because I can.  For so many other things I will only be able to give you my advice and send you out to learn on your own.

But I will vanquish those stairs.  For you, baby girl.

Even though you love them.

p.s. They really are my enemy.  They are very steep as they are original to my very old house and used to lead to the old attic.  They are not to fire code at the bottom and are “grandfathered in”.  I am assuming this means I am getting grey hairs just having them in my home.

p.p.s. I have fallen down them.  I am a little clumsy.  I am often in a hurry. 

p.p.p.s If I wasn’t so afraid of sleeping downstairs I would own a ranch house.

p.p.p.p.s. Doesn’t she look cute on the stairs.  Like, the candy coated voice is calling to me to let her climb them just to see that smile.  She can’t clap and end up with her arms in front of her face on the stairs.

p.p.p.p.p.s.  I know the stairs are nothing compared to high school.


Join the discussion 10 Comments

  • Sue says:

    The stairs were definitely our enemy and we don’t even live in an old house. She still loves them dearly, but we have a gate at the bottom that keeps her from climbing them unassisted, but every time that gate opens she runs for her climbing apparatus…or the front door…which is also our enemy…they’re right next to one another – ganging up on us…thankfully, we have had no spills and she is pretty adept at going both up and down (although going down involves her bottom on each stair as she inches her way down). At least there is a landing, carpet on the stairs and at the bottom, and we have the gate. Thank God for small gifts! 🙂 Great post!
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  • Krista says:

    Oh, STAIRS! Bain of my existance for several years. We have 16 hard wood stairs leading up to our 2nd floor. After baby#1 took a tumble down all 16 — nightmare that I don’t wish to relive right at this moment — we installed gates at the top and bottom.
    So glad to be done with that portion of our lives (youngest is 3). Hang in there!
    Krista recently posted… Mostly Mommyhood- I loved my outfit todayMy Profile

  • We live in an apartment so my baby has never been around stairs. This past weekend we visited friends in DC and were all hanging out in the living room. The baby crawls over to the bottom of the stairs and my friend says— Uh, you’re baby is by the stairs. And I’m all like it’s fine, she can’t climb stairs. And my friend says— Uh, she climbed three.

    Oooops. Time to pay more attention to the child!
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  • I hate stairs. I’m actually trying to convince my husband to move into a house without stairs. His solution was to buy gates, but even with those up I still slip on the stairs, once while holding The Boy. I don’t know what I was thinking when we bought our place, especially after living in a house with stairs and 3 siblings. There were many trips to the er for stitches.

  • SuperJenn says:

    We have a one level house and whenever we go somewhere with stairs I realize how ill prepared I am to protect my children from them…because I am not used to them being there. When SuperGirl was just crawling were were at my inlaws and I actually sprinted across the floor, did a home plate slide and caught her as she began to fall head first down some very.steep.stairs. My heart was in my throat.

    I can’t imagine having stairs in my house.

    I’m not letting my daughter go to high school.

  • I have lived in fear for the past 6 years that one of my 3 children would tumble down our stairs and land on the hard cold slate at the bottom! Shudder!!!!

    Thankfully I think we are past the worst of it now. But you can never let your guard down!!!

    And Oh My God she is cutest thing I have ever seen!!! Or maybe the 4th cutest!

  • I second the sentiment of not letting my kids go to highschool! I love the thought behind this post. I am wondering though, why are you afraid of sleeping down stairs??? Maybe that’s for another blog entry but just curious.
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  • Jamie says:

    Our stairs are also my enemy. We have fancy, schmancy gates to keep Baby Bee from falling to her death. She’s getting close to the age to be able to navigate them herself, though, so they’ll be coming down soon.

  • statia says:

    Baby gates were made for paranoid moms like me. The funny thing is that I never really needed them for my son. He wasn’t a danger baby the way my 18 month is. He’s fallen down the stairs a few times, just due to his klutzy nature and that sight? Yeah, forever etched in my mind. My daughter = danger seeker, and less clumsy. Even though she’s good at the stairs, I still keep them blocked off. I don’t like the emergency room so much.

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