Sophia had her 5th birthday party last night. Her ocean theme was a big hit and after we sent all the kids home at bedtime post the flashlight seashell hunt we fell into chairs with some friends and some drinks. Somehow the conversation turned to sex and I realized that one day my kids would have sex. No, I am not an idiot…I just try not to think about it. Then my husband casually mentioned something about 1o years from now. Sophia will be 15. I thought I was going to throw up. Not because I am afraid of having sex or have any issue with getting it on at all. Nope, it is because it seems like nowadays young people are having sex at an earlier age and are having it more often with more people. I have watched television. I know we have to talk about sex before she is 15. Because clearly kids are having it then. Me knowing and me being okay with it are two very different things.
I must be old fashioned because seeing a Cosmo magazine makes me a little nauseous. It is all sex all the time. Is there even a relationship before the boom boom happens? I can’t imagine my babies doing it just to do it, and yet it seems that is where the world is going. I must have something in me from my days of Sunday School that absolutely prevents me from seeing sex as just a physical act. I see so much more and so much danger in treating something that is both physically and emotionally serious so casually.
I know I have a lot of time but I am already wondering how to prepare my kids for this world where everything is so out there and where they will know about things so very early and have to handle the challenges. I know that I need to raise strong, confident kids who have the ability to be themselves even when the tide is moving away from them. I am not sure I know how to teach them about sex and I know that the way I feel may be going out of style more and more each year. Still, I think having sex comes with a lot of responsibility and a lot of potential consequences that I don’t ever want my kids to have to face. An unwanted pregnancy, an STD or even broken heart…I fear sex for these things and more.
I want to do more research and find some facts and figures and actually explore the concept of casual sex, but for now I am just pouring my thoughts out as they come to get the conversation started and get this off my chest. So what if I am old fashioned? I still think sex is a big thing.
What do you think about sex?
I wrote for 5 minutes straight for Fadra’s Stream of Consciousness Sunday. No edits, no re-writes. Forgive spelling and grammar please. Just what’s on the heart and mind. It’s a great way to get it out!