Raising a Real Miss Universe

By August 24, 2010Opinion, Self Image

Intelligence, a big heart and the most fantastic gown (just an added bonus) – the choice is easy!  Sophia for Miss Universe!

Clearly with all the body image issues we are having around here we do not watch the Miss Universe pageants or any other pageants for that matter.  At least not with the kids.  Sophia does not need any more sparkles to ogle, that’s for sure.  And she does not need to be confusing gowns and boobs and makeup as essential ingredients for making a real woman – one who represents the world.

When I tell her what a fabulous little girl she is I do tell her that she is a beautiful person both outside and in.  I don’t kid myself that looks don’t matter out there but I won’t let that be our focus.  She is asking how she looks – but I tell her that is not what is important.  I tell her it is what is inside that counts.  I will tell her this and try to demonstrate it with every breath I have.  It is that important.

Beauty is only skin deep.

She is learning that it is most important to learn as much as she can about the world and the people around her and to be a good friend to those people – both those she knows and those she does not.   This is not an easy lesson – but one that will change her life for the better every time she gives of herself.

I want her to have a good education and I will do everything in my power to make sure that she gets one.  With knowledge comes power and strength.  The power to change the world and the strength to be herself when facing adversity, to include people who others exclude, to show love in the face of hatred and misunderstanding.

I am proud of her little mind already.  She has learned about Muscular Dystrophy and what is means to be handicapped and sick as a child while I have been raising money for children suffering from this disease.  She has gone house to house with me asking for donations.  She has learned that some people give willingly and has questioned me when people have refused.  It has been a real learning experience for her.  She cried when we talked about these children dying at very young ages.  She has a big heart.  Service to others will always be a part of her upbringing.  I believe it will make her heart larger and her life more fulfilling.

I hope she remembers her childhood as one filled with gifts of love and compassion – both for her and for others less fortunate.

I hope that all of my children can work to better their minds, their communities, our country and maybe someday our world.  That would truly be an inspiration and make for some real role models on our planet.

How are you teaching your children to live in our confusing world?  How do you incorporate your community and giving to others in your parenting?  At what age can kids start getting involved?  Do you know any programs that accept little volunteers?  I would love to hear your feedback and read anything you have written about giving back with your kids!  Let’s all encourage each other to raise intelligent and generous men and women.  That will really change our universe.

Just so you know, I do not take any issue with beautiful women and hey – there are days when I would love to have those Miss Universe looks.  I am in no way judging the women in the competition and I am sure that many of them are not only beautiful but intelligent and warm hearted.  It’s just sometimes hard to see that on T.V.  while being judged in a swimsuit.  The whole pageant thing just is not for me.

Join the discussion 9 Comments

  • Kelly says:

    I just try to set the example for my kids. No negative self-talk, no gossip (in front of them), etc. I am a Jaycee, so I run and participate in lots of projects that they can help with. For instance, when we do a school supply drive, the kids help me collect items and drop them off. When we serve meals, one sets the table and the other helps clean up. We are serious about our community service and hope that our children will continue to give back as they grow up. It also helps give them some perspective on diversity and true beauty.

  • Brittany says:

    That sounds wonderful. I am going to be doing a diaper drive in the coming months as well as a Lemonade stand to raise money for cancer and the kids are super excited to help. I think you are showing a great example! Just because I am not so smart – what is a Jaycee?

  • I work for a non profit that has an amazing program for kids (and adults for that matter). I have been involved since I was 6, and it has made me who I am, for sure! The kids portion (ages 5-college) is very focused on community service and leadership development. We have chapters across the state (although none in Charlotte, I want one here, and would love to start one!) .



  • I know it seems cliche, but every year at Christmas, we have our children take some of their allowance money that they have been saving for charity (in a separate jar from the rest) and purchase a toy for the toys for tots drive or some other children’s toy drive. Through my work, we give toys for Native American children on two reservations in New Mexico and Arizona. My kids seem to really get that they’re helping when they realize that it’s kids to whom they are giving. But I agree with Kelly too. Your example is the best way that you can teach your kids to be compassionate. Something we all can work for everyday.
    Grateful Twin Mom recently posted… And the Camp Mom Award for Engaged Kids goes to Team Twins!My Profile

  • Glamamom says:

    I think it’s fantastic that you’re being so thoughtful and proactive with your daughter! The world needs more of that.

    My son is only 11 months so I have a little time before I start “teaching” but my goal is to raise compassionate kids that are respectful of themselves and others. I think the best way to do that is to teach them how to communicate their feelings verbally, encourage education, and most importantly, lead by example 🙂
    Glamamom recently posted… EUCERIN SKINCARE GIVEAWAYMy Profile

  • You are already doing the best thing possible, teaching by example. She will learn to see the world realistically by watching what you do and hearing what you say. That will help her siphon out the negative influences of the world. Raising a well rounded women isn’t easy.
    SoniaBarton recently posted… My new WheelsMy Profile

  • With an upbringing like that, screw Miss Universe!
    She should run for President.

    It’s so important to teach our children to give, to be grateful and to be compassionate. You are setting a wonderful example for all of your girls!
    Nicole at Chic and Cheap Nursery recently posted… Real Room- “Hooray!” for Little GirlsMy Profile

  • Melisa says:

    I think the easiest way to teach a child is by example. I agree about the pageants, it is hard to watch and then tell a girl that looks really dont’ matter when it is plastered all over that it does!

    Have you seen the Little Miss Perfect pageants? I’ve watched a few episodes and I have to wonder if those parents know what they are teaching their children.

  • Loukia says:

    She is very, very, very beautiful. I hope she grows up to one ver confident girl and woman! 🙂 I think she will – she has such a great role model for a mom! 🙂

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