Brothers and Sisters: Missing the Pieces

By November 18, 2010My Life

I am one of 4 children.  One quarter of my sibling circle.  I am the oldest and the momma of the group.  Sometimes I am bossy, and alwasy have been.  Usually I am protective, sometimes overly so.  My love for my brother and sisters is unconditional.  That doesn’t always mean it is easy or that we like each other, but I love them no matter what.

When you grow up together yu never really think about how far apart you may someday be.  I never really knew I would have so many days when I wanted a hug  – not from my mom or even my husband but from my brother or sister.

And now, they are all so far away.  And I get no hugs.

It has been years since we have all been together, and the last time, we didn’t even get a picture.  This holiday season, things will be no different.  We will not share a group hug.

I miss them.  Somedays I wish families just all stayed together.

So I’m just saying here how much I love them, and miss them and hey guys…this is for you.

Grambo Sambo…I missed you terribly on all of your deployments and while you were halfway across the world risking your life for the freedom of others, I spent sleepless nights praying for you and waiting to hug you again.  Little brother – I love you.  I’m so glad you came home safely.  I can’t wait to see you and hug you and watch you play with my kids.  They love you too.  You are full of light and love and I know things have been tough since you came home…so tough.  You are strong.  Your courage inspires me.  And of course, see above, I love you unconditionally forever and ever.

Graham and His Son Blake

Katie, our Katstopher…I miss you every day.  You were here for so long and then so much happened and then you were gone…trying to find yourself, trying to build a new life.   I am so proud of what you have accomplished and I have missed you terribly while you have been at Camp Pendleton.  Little Sister, I love you, and I hope you always come home safely.  I can’t wait to see you and hug you and watch you play with my kids.  They love you too.  You are full of so much passion and love and potential.  It is all possible sweetie.  And of course, see above, I love you unconditionally forever and ever.

Katie and Sophia at Camp LeJeune

Tay Tay…wow.  You have been gone, halfway across the world, for more than a year.  Some days I wondered where you were.  Some days I worried about your safety.  I am so amazed at all the places you have been and the courage it took to leave with just a backpack and travel the world.  I can’t even tell you how wonderful it was to talk to you the other day, for the first time in a year.  To hear your voice.  To see your smile.  For you to see Violet jumping and laughing for the first time.  I wish I had figured out Skype sooner, and that you were nearer my time zone.  New Zealand can be tough to coordinate, babe.  I will miss you again at Christmas.  We all will.  I hope you are finding what you are looking for.  I hope you are finding your creative inspiration, and that your words are flowing freely.  They are beautiful.  Little sister, I love you, and I hope you come home soon and stay safe.  I can’t wait to see you and hug you and watch you play with my kids (and meet Violet!) whenever that may be.  You are creative and free and and beautiful and you will do great things with your art.  And of course, see above, I love you unconditionally forever and ever. (This is Taylor on Halloween.  Yes – I wish I had vistas like that in my life.)

Taylor in New Zealand

Siblings…its a crazy kind of love.  We have laughed and cried and wrestled and hugged and loved and hated and pushed and pulled and now, we are not together.

But I hope one day soon we are.

Because I sort of feel like I am missing a little piece of me.

And it’s an important piece.



p.s. Tell me about your siblings!  Go ahead, make me jealous…do you see them all the time?  Are you close?  Do you miss them so so much like I do?

Join the discussion 15 Comments

  • nichole says:

    My brother is less than 3 hours away. I don’t see him as often as i’d like, but we do email and talk on the phone regularly.
    nichole recently posted… The scale fails to encourage Perry MasonMy Profile

  • Barb says:

    Awwww! This is so true! I have 2 older brothers and we all live close but with work and kids and all that we dont see each other all that often. I think about the day in and day out relationships we used to have and I totally miss that!

  • Maria says:

    I live within five minutes of both my sisters, and my older brother, and my parents. My other older brother lives with his wife and two kids in D.C. My Mother has made a rule that we have to be all together every year at Xmas at her home. Except for two where my bro was in the U.S. waiting on his green card and couldn’t get away, we’ve all been together every year. Our table has grown from 7 to 19 people!
    Maria recently posted… Disney On Ice – Mickey &amp Minnie’s Magical Journey – GIVEAWAYMy Profile

  • Emily says:

    I am right there with you, feeling the distance from family! My mom and stepdad live in Utah, my dad is in Atlanta, I am in southern Georgia and recently my only brother moved to Raliegh, NC to start his first real job (gasp!). Not to mention all my extended family resides in Canada!
    It’s hard to image a time when we were all together, and it makes me terribly sad if I think about it too much. But, I do know they are all just a phone call or e-mail away, though these things could never replace a group hug 🙁
    Emily recently posted… finally writing a post on procrastinatingMy Profile

  • Candice says:

    My brother, sister, and I are very close – both emotionally and geographically. In fact, it’d be hard to get much closer. My sister lives about 10 blocks away and my brother lives with me! It’s really fantastic (and my parents are in the same town, too – you can imagine how much they love this, especially with the grandkids around).

    I don’t mean to make you jealous… but it is great. I feel really lucky, especially after my brother was in Miami (1000 miles away) for three years for law school and I worried about him every single day. I can’t imagine having to handle him or my sister being in the military or traveling the world. I’d want hourly text messages.
    Candice recently posted… Team Ree!My Profile

    • Candice says:

      Oh, and I’ll add that I’m the oldest, as well. Now that I have Nate, I see just how much my feelings toward my sister (4 years younger) and my brother (6 years younger) often mimic parental feelings.
      Candice recently posted… Team Ree!My Profile

  • I love your post! I too am the oldest of four and am quite bossy at times. I get to see Little Brother #2 and Baby Sister almost daily, but at least once a week. Little Brother #1 passed away nearly 4 years ago, but there isn’t a day I don’t think about him.

  • Kelly says:

    I have four siblings, all of whom live at least 10 minutes from me. I rarely see the youngest two (ages 13 and 11, from a second marriage) and never see my older sister (we are estranged), but I see my younger sister (and best friend) almost every day. She is a blessing to me!

  • Lisa says:

    I am the oldest of 5, I have 4 younger brothers. They live 1000 miles away. However, luckily it is all in the same spot, so when I go home once or twice a year I get to see them all. I’m so grateful for that. I miss them terribly and wish I could be more a part of their day to day lives.
    Lisa recently posted… Fighting for PreemiesMy Profile

  • amber says:

    I only have one brother, but lots of cousins I am close too. But like your family, we are spread far and wide. At this season especially, I wish we could all come back home to stay.

  • Teresa says:

    My sisters and I are separated not only by age (they are 8 and 16 years older than me), but also by distance (I am in NC, oldest is in GA, other in Hawaii).

  • Bryna says:

    I have 1 sister who I love dearly. She is 3 1/2 hours away and I HATE IT! I wish she’d “move home” but I know that’s a slim chance… Family is family, so no matter how long it’s been, when we get together it’s always great!!!!

  • Posts like this make me so happy to be giving my children the gift of siblings– it’s really the best gifts we can give them. 🙂 Such a sweet post!

  • April says:

    Awww….this made me want to hug you!

  • World Spinner says:

    Brothers and Sisters: Missing the Pieces | Mommy Words…

    Here at World Spinner we are debating the same thing……

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